Having my way with words.

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The physical act of typing, (especially on a mac, praise Apple), gives me great satisfaction. I believe this is down to my neurotic enjoyment of having total, perfectionist control over the keyboard. Every word that slips through my fingers is somehow a happy accident, that can be erased, edited or expanded on. This means I can express my creativity with complete editorial control. Once sufficient words are on the page I can relax, in the knowledge that the rough inkling of a beautifully sculpted phrase or paragraph fluttering round my head has been preserved adequately enough to never precipitate back into brain fog.

As a younger person my efforts to edit my 'live self' brought me regular anxiety as of course it's not possible to do so without a massive sacrifice of character. Today I find a lot of comfort in editing my words on the page so I feel no need to do so in 'real life' and as most people do as they get older, I generally care less of what others think of me and more of what I think of myself. I hope the next step is inevitably caring less about what I think of myself, although what I think of myself could be the route of all productivity, so maybe not.

I am writing this to preserve the way I feel about writing. As a writer I believe writing about writing is crucial in understanding why you write. Well thats enough. :)

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